6 Simple Steps to Boost Confidence at Midlife for Women 45+

Strength training for women over 45, midlife confidence, and menopause mindset shifts all come together in this episode where we talk about the simple steps that help women rebuild confidence during midlife. If you’ve been feeling invisible, uncertain, or disconnected from the woman you used to be, this conversation will bring you back to yourself in the best way.

Inside, we walk through five practical, doable steps to help you reconnect with your wisdom, soften your inner critic, take small brave actions, set boundaries without guilt, and rebuild body confidence from the inside out. These are the exact strategies I teach my clients when they’re ready to feel like themselves again.

Midlife is not the ending. It’s the part where everything finally makes sense.

Menopause Minis | 10-Minute Strength Workouts for Women 45+

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Free Menopause Sleep Guide

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Strong Bones in Menopause | Free Guide for Women 45+

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Foundational 4 Supplements | Menopause Nutrition Made Simple

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Free Menopause Home Gym Guide | Strength Training at Home

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Wins Beyond the Scale | Free Checklist for Midlife Women

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Chapters:
00:00 Rediscovering Yourself in Midlife
03:48 Treat Yourself Like a Friend
07:19 Awesome vs. Awful People
09:36 Movement as Self-Connection

Transcript

0:00

Have you ever looked in the mirror and wondered where the woman you've always been has gone? You know, the woman who used to move through the world with grace and ease and certainty and a fire in her step. Midlife can make you feel like someone has swapped her out for a different version of you. One that hesitates, second guesses and feels a little dimmer around the edges. But here's the part most women never heard. This dip in confidence isn't a sign you've lost anything. I actually believe it's an opening, a quiet doorway to this powerful you that you haven't even fully met yet. Hey there. I'm Cam Allen. Welcome back to the menopause method. You are walking through one of the biggest transitions of your life. One minute you're sharp and you're steady, and the next minute you're fighting brain fog so thick you forget what you're saying mid-sentence. Has that ever happened to you? Maybe you're caring for aging parents. Maybe you're figuring out your shifting family roles. Empty nest. I'm a new grandma. You're navigating career changes. Maybe. Maybe they feel stalled or completely, like, worn out. And then menopause shows up with its own set of symptoms that can hit your confidence and your body image at the same time. Many women feel this drop. Some women even, like, leave their job or their marriage. But this is not the end of your story. This is actually the part where things get really honest and very powerful. And today I'm breaking down five simple steps that can help you reclaim that self belief. These are the same steps I teach inside my coaching work. And I've watched them change women from the inside out, including myself. So, number one, we're going to turn this great reframe into your superpower. Let's start with a belief that trips so many of us up. The idea that youth equals your value. You see, we have been trained that aging is like a slow fade. But that idea doesn't hold up when you really look at the full picture of your life. Age is not a weakness. It's actually your advantage. You've lived, you've handled hard things. You have lots of skills and this amazing intuition. Plus, you have wisdom now that younger you certainly didn't have. You know how to navigate conflict. You know how to set boundaries without spiraling out of control. Guess what? That's not something you lose. It actually compounds with time. Midlife women are starting companies, they're starting new careers, they're doing art, they're raising their voices, and they're reshaping what this season looks like. That old narrative is gone. A simple way to lock this in is called a wisdom log. At the end of the day, you write one thing down. That 25-year-old, you didn't know just one sentence. That's it. And over time, you're going to have a journal full of proof of who you are. Not becoming smaller, not becoming dimmer, but wiser and deeper. Number two, we're going to quiet that inner critic. Most women tell me the loudest part they fight in midlife isn't the hot flashes or the weight changes, which suck, I know. But it's actually the voice in their heads. That one that picks apart every single mistake and overlooks every single win. And then you throw some hormones in there and that can make that voice even sharper. Which is why self-compassion becomes a non-negotiable at this stage of life. It's not a luxury. Treat yourself as you would treat a friend. In fact, my friend just sent me a reel on Instagram last week and the creator was saying, imagine you were switching bodies with your best friend for a year. How would you treat your best friend's body? How would you move it? What would you feed it? What would you say to it? Knowing that at the end of the year you're going to swap bodies back. Wow, it was powerful. You would never tell a friend she's failing because she messed up one sentence or, you know, didn't do something. You would actually offer her perspective and a lot of grace. Can you offer yourself the same thing? I call this the evidence technique. When that critic starts spiraling and causes, all you have to do is pause and ask, is that even true? And then ask, where's the proof? Because your brain skipped all the positive evidence and it's just going to the negative. That part paints the fuller picture. Place your hand on your heart and say, I'm still learning. I'm growing and this moment isn't all of me. Your nervous system is going to respond to that. And the shift from attack to support is going to be amazing. And guess what comes from support? Your confidence grows. Number three, the power of the bravest little thing. So we know that confidence doesn't drop from the sky. You build it through action. And it doesn't need to be big action. It's actually tiny action. We get stuck because we think we need to feel confident before we actually do the thing. But confidence is not the reward, it's the prerequisite. You gotta start small. So small almost feels too Easy. The smallest bravest thing actually moves you forward today. And that's it. Maybe it's a 15 minute search for a new job at work. Or maybe it's writing one email or responding to an email. Maybe it's just taking a walk to the end of your block. Just a single rep of something new. Use the 5 second rule from Mel Robin when you feel that hesitation starting. So how do you do it? You count down from five and when you get down to one, you go, that's it. It interrupts the stall pattern and gets you into motion. And in motion is where you're going to build your confidence and know what you're going to do next. So write down your smallest brave thing for today. Do it. And then tomorrow do another. And watch how fast your confidence starts to stack. Number four. Curate your world. This is straight from the neuro linguistic programming world mirrors and boundaries. Your environment shapes how you see yourself, who you talk to, what you consume, where you spend your time, how you spend your money. All of that matters. So find your believing mirrors. I actually saw a believing mirror last week when I went to the Stevie Nicks conference concert. She was 77. Her voice was strong. I just like being in the same room with her was amazing. And her twirling, it was amazing. People that are in your believing mirror hold a clear reflection of your strengths when you can't see them. She was so inspiring to me. She's definitely in my believing mirror. The ones who remind you of who you are. That reflection is a total gift now. So those are your believing mirrors. On the other hand, we also have the limit. The doubting mirrors. The people who drain you and question you and make you feel heavier and like exhausted after you talk to them. Guess what? Your body already knows who they are. So pay attention to that. I call it the awesome awful test. When you're in a room with people and you go home, notice how you feel. Do you have more energy? Do you feel encouraged? Do you want to be hang out with them? Or are you exhausted and you're in your pantry looking for something to eat? Your body knows. Are they awesome? Are they awful? The awesome people are your believing mirrors. They're reflecting something that's in you that you just couldn't see. On the other hand, the people that exhaust you, those aren't your people. So how do we apply boundaries? Midlife asks you to get serious about your energy. Like I just said, the awesome awful test. Saying yes to things that drain you is a fast track to resentment and burnout. I just get bitter and angry and mad when I say yes to things I don't want to say yes to. I'm getting better. Boundaries aren't meant to be harsh, they're just actually a necessity. You are literally protecting your vital energy that makes you who you are. Start with an energy audit for a week. What fills you up? What empties you? Take a piece of paper in your journal, draw a line down, awesome, awful. On one side write awesome. One side, write awful. And just track of things that fill you up and things that drain you. And then what you get to do on the drain side. On the awful side, set a boundary. Small is enough. Maybe it's a time limit. Maybe. Maybe it's a pause. Maybe it's just no. And that's the end of the sentence. That's how confident grows roots and makes your life so much more energetic. Number five, Reconnecting with your body. Okay, let's be honest. The physical changes in life can really shake your sense of self. Your weight changes, you have more maybe weight around your belly. Your energy dips, your skin changes. And it's really easy to slip into self judgment. But your body is not your enemy. It's actually what carries your soul and allows you to experience life. It is your home. It's what you live in. So when you shift your focus from appearance to sensation, from how you look to how you feel, movement helps with this more than anything else. Because movement is not as punishment. Movement is not fix my body. It is just movement that brings you back to yourself. Back in my 40s when I was going through a divorce, I would use exercise to get out of my mind and the endless crazy thoughts that happen when you go through a divorce and back into my body. And yes, 10 minutes still counts. And if you need help with 10 minute strength workouts, I have the Menopause minis. They have changed my body composition and hundreds of other women are using the menopause minis. So 10 minutes counts. Check the notes for it. Stretching, walking, dancing in your kitchen, gardening, whatever it is, movement says I'm here and I'm listening. Pair that with like five minutes of mindful breathing or maybe get the Insight Timer which is a free app and listen to a meditation and let your nervous system settle in. This will soften that inner critic and helps you reconnect with your body that you are living in right now. Schedule this 10 minutes a day for a week. Treat it like a meeting with yourself. Number six, the victory log. How do you rewire your brain this is straight out of nlp. I love nlp. I realized that my limiting beliefs were keeping holding me back and I see it with my clients too. Your brain will always spot the one thing that you skip faster than the 20 things that you did well. Isn't that true? It's called the negativity bias. And you're not broken. You are just human. So a victory log helps you retrain that pattern. So every night, write down three wins. They could be big, they could be small. Because small counts and small is where confidence is born. And when you look back, you'll see the truth of who you are in black and white. Capable, consistent, resilient. So the victory log is a wonderful way to track that. I remember 28 years ago after my son was born, doing a gratitude journal. It's very similar. At the end of the day, what three things are you grateful for? These steps will work when you use them. They are so simple and they're created for real shifts. Ones which are calling you right now. Which ones sound good to you? Is it the wisdom log? Comparing yourself now to your 25 year old self? Or maybe it's one small brave thing. 5, 4, 3, 2, 1. Go. What are you going to do? Maybe it's a clean boundary after you have your awesome awful list. Once you have your awesome awful list, maybe there's some awful things that you need to set a boundary around. Tell me in the comments what you're going to start with. Your voice might be the thing another woman needs to hear. And finally, if you found this helpful, please hit subscribe and hit that notification bell. I share new strategies every single week to help you make this chapter of your life the absolute best one. Thanks for being here.